No one asked but I’m providing it anyway, brought to you by my own self deprecation. Enjoy. (door creaks open) Oh Hi, God I didn’t even see you come in. Look I know we just met and all but I think I can really trust you. See, I’ve come to the conclusion(for the third time today) that I’m beyond help at this point and I don’t know what to do about it. ( You should just pretend voice…
Tag: dreams
Audio Bio: Sarah French
SOUND: MELODIC PIANO MUSIC BEGINS AND REMAINS IN THE BACKGROUND SARAH There is a futility to redacting everything I have ever read into one representative title. It’s almost laughable, the breadth and depth of things I have read. But, invariably, once someone finds out I’m an editor I get the question. “What’s your favorite book?” Either that or “Will you look at my manuscript?” I’m not sure which is worse….
Audio Bio: Ayla Nyriese
Juxta Crucem begins, slowly fading into the background ass the eulogy begins] Dearly Beloved, we are gathered here today to remember fondly the life of Ayla Nyriese. Born in 1997, Ayla was adopted by two Lutheran pastors. She grew up attending funerals, touching her first dead body at the young age of four. Her father was not pleased. Throughout her childhood, Ayla spent her time being a menace to society….
Audio Bio: Mitch Roshannon
Hey, my name is Mitch Roshannon. I consider myself a writer by trade, though I’ve done and still do a lot of different jobs to make ends meet. I’m the kind of guy that defines himself through his work, and considers work an important part of my identity. I think what we do matters, and how we feel about it matters even more. I’ve worked as a stock guy in big retail stores for one. This…
Audio Bio: Lin “Flora” Seavey
Hello, I am Flora. You may recognize me as the person who played the trumpet as loud as they could out their window at 9 pm on a Tuesday night I have the important announcement to make that I am out there and I will not hesitate Do you ever open your window to hear the sound of the cicadas? Let their cries wash over you like the rising tides? (cicada start) Lay down in the grass and…
Audio Bio: Megan Shaffer
(OMINOUS SOUND) Welcome to Megan’s Medical Morge. Hello, my name is Megan Shaffer and I’m 5’11. That is usually not relevant, but it is for my life because I am the clumsiest person in the world (CARTOON SLIPS) but also someone who used to try to avoid attention, and being this tall, it was impossible to hide in a crowd of people. The higher my face off the ground (CARTOON FALLING), the more air I could fall through to fall on…
Audio Bio: Nikki Anderson
“Hi Sweetheart, it’s just Grandma here. You enjoy your new adventure in Pennsylvania, I’m sure you’re gonna love Susquehanna U. And knowing you, you’re gonna have one heck of a terrific time there getting a great education and everything you love and enjoy. Good luck sweetheart, I love you and I’m thinking bout you all the time.” Audio of You Better Don’t by Apache Tomcat fades up after voicemail starts, plays throughout as ambience for first half “When I…