No one asked but I’m providing it anyway, brought to you by my own self deprecation. Enjoy. (door creaks open) Oh Hi, God I didn’t even see you come in. Look I know we just met and all but I think I can really trust you. See, I’ve come to the conclusion(for the third time today) that I’m beyond help at this point and I don’t know what to do about it. ( You should just pretend voice…
Month: November 2018
Audio Bio: Mira Theroux
[Starts with pop-punk music – electric guitar and drum set, slowly fades out] MIRA: Hey, I’m Mira. I use she/her pronouns – as opposed to he/him, they/them, or whatever else one may prefer. Because you’ve probably already been asking yourself this, yes, girls can have deep voices. But I didn’t come here to talk about my voice, I came here to talk about me, and what’s important to me….
Audio Bio: Marissa Massare
Cheyenne Intro: Marissa is a soft-spoken, kind, caring, family obsessed, kitty loving, amazing young woman, with a great head on her shoulders, a great personality, and a great religion that holds her together. Lauren Intro: Marissa is a pancake eating, kitty cat loving, dancing queen, who loves to read books. She’s also a great friend. Larissa Intro: Marissa is an ice cream loving, nap taking, graceful dancer, cat enthusiast, has hometown pride, and is…
Audio Bio: Jacob Tashoff
Scene: 1 My name is Jacob Tashoff, and I bet you’re wondering how I got here. SOUND: RECORD SCRATCH Everything I am about to tell you is one hundred percent true. Except for the parts that are made up. But don’t worry about that. I sit here, cloaked in the darkness, on the verge of greatness. My story is nearing its climax. A climax so violent, so awe-inspiring and earth-shattering,…
Audio Bio: Nikki Borgel
10 Characterizing and Dramatic Micro Stories About Nikki the Unexpected Podcaster My older brother was the one who originally suggested that my parents name me Nikki. My mom fell in love with the idea because she hated the previously suggested Nicole option. Despite being the one who named me, the first thing my brother ever called me was Nickelodeon, and to this day everyone just assumes my name is Nicole so I’ve started answering to literally any variation of Nick. The first time…
Audio Bio: Sarah French
SOUND: MELODIC PIANO MUSIC BEGINS AND REMAINS IN THE BACKGROUND SARAH There is a futility to redacting everything I have ever read into one representative title. It’s almost laughable, the breadth and depth of things I have read. But, invariably, once someone finds out I’m an editor I get the question. “What’s your favorite book?” Either that or “Will you look at my manuscript?” I’m not sure which is worse….
Audio Bio: Brianna Simmons
Open with ambient noises from the inside of a moving car. Brianna: Hi, I’m Brianna. I don’t really know where we are at the moment, it’s too dark to tell. But I’m pretty sure we’re close to where we need to go. A car and a motorcycle pass in the background. I thought the moon would finally make an appearance, sadly, I don’t think he’ll be joining us tonight. I love…
Audio Bio: Ayla Nyriese
Juxta Crucem begins, slowly fading into the background ass the eulogy begins] Dearly Beloved, we are gathered here today to remember fondly the life of Ayla Nyriese. Born in 1997, Ayla was adopted by two Lutheran pastors. She grew up attending funerals, touching her first dead body at the young age of four. Her father was not pleased. Throughout her childhood, Ayla spent her time being a menace to society….
Audio Bio: Mitch Roshannon
Hey, my name is Mitch Roshannon. I consider myself a writer by trade, though I’ve done and still do a lot of different jobs to make ends meet. I’m the kind of guy that defines himself through his work, and considers work an important part of my identity. I think what we do matters, and how we feel about it matters even more. I’ve worked as a stock guy in big retail stores for one. This…
Audio Bio: Lin “Flora” Seavey
Hello, I am Flora. You may recognize me as the person who played the trumpet as loud as they could out their window at 9 pm on a Tuesday night I have the important announcement to make that I am out there and I will not hesitate Do you ever open your window to hear the sound of the cicadas? Let their cries wash over you like the rising tides? (cicada start) Lay down in the grass and…